Posts Tagged Nollywood

Random Yarns….

I’m not a big fan of the Nigerian film industry aped Nollywood (I meant to say named) and if you asked me now I can think of only a very few productions that have really made/left their mark with Oléku still my favourite Nigerian film many years since it came, and a new film titled Ijé may just join that elite few…may.

I haven’t seen the film and I probably won’t anytime soon. My focus is the origin of the script for the film that reportedly sold out its first screening at a cinema on the Island. The script of Ijé is actually the (or part of the) thesis of a Nigerian student of the prestigious New York Film Academy… Ah! Someone’s final year project o!

I’m confident delivery of roles in the film isn’t an issue; Genevieve Nnaji’s come a long way to her current stardom, Clem Ohaneze more so and Omotola Jalade-Ekeinde even more so. The foreign cast in the film, including Ulrich Que, also have pretty cool repute attached to them unlike previously where just any white-skinned fellows would do.

Otherwise all that, Ijé’s script most probably has been adapted in a previous production here but imperatively, the difference (what would be going for Ijé) would be the quality of the script (that New York school no be small thing o) and delivery from the cast…it’s about quality people.

So I wonder if the Federal Government, in the melee of its acceptance of every financial requests in the billions of recent, will consider a string of ideas from budding Nigerians as us who are just about prepped to pounce on the slightest window of opportunity at partaking of the infamous national cake or what’s the benefit of a documentary. The Director of this ‘epic’ production better retire when s/he’s done with it because N250m begins to describe what it takes to produce a Hollywood movie.

So here’s my proposal to the FG – an Obelisk 50ft high with lights at the top that will shine into the night sky; lights capable of illuminating whatever the FG wants illuminated, from a N5000 note to the EFCC logo. I’ll go with the latter.

If that seems far fetched for them, I’ll go with a proposal to create a Nigerian Thesaurus which should be greatly beneficial to those who want to know the real, present day Nigeria. A peek of what the Thesaurus will contain goes thus:

Loan (vrb.): the act of being approached for financial assistance without insurance or assurance of repayment. A popular action among undergraduates.

Maga (n./vrb.): where two parties or one party in cooperation with two or more parties become affiliated to/with each other for the sake of benefits inherent.

National Cake (n.): the whole of a lump of massive finance available to very few. Not to be mistook for national cakes made for independence anniversaries of other countries. Ambition for it is found rampant in the echelons of power.

Nigerian Factor (adv.): a concept used to describe the complex complicated nature of reality in an immediate environment and events therein. Similar to Nigerian Mentality which is genetically inherited, Nigerian Factor is physically inherited. Concept is aptly captured in the education sector, Admissions Office.

Nigerian Mentality (adv.): an aura of total pessimism displayed consistently due to influence(s) of factors in the immediate environment. Definition is aptly captured when a neighbourhood in the country enjoys uninterrupted power supply for 30 hours or more, residents start to wonder if the transformer won’t overload and pack up soon as a result.

©δ.õÁ 06/08/2010 ™


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Youth Empowerment

It is nearly satisfying to see that more Nigerian youth are starting to take keener interest in the polity of the nation, voicing their discontent at what is wrong with the system and why unacceptable actions such as corruption, kidnapping et al continue to persist.

However, until the feeling is fully satisfying and not just nearly; since almost does not kill a bird, the Nigerian youth still have a plenty lot to do in order to realise the better Nigeria we yearn for.

For years we’ve voiced against a regressive Nigeria and the recycling of leaders to the point where fresh, progressive ideas to move the nation forward has become impossible but in reality, it is action that speaks louder and better than words.

It is where the House of Succour comes in, giving opportunity to motivated youth to brainstorm on ideas capable of impacting positively on themselves and their immediate environment initially with the ultimate goal being to have a halo of development that will steadily and surely have its positive effect on the country.

So rather than sit back in expectation of those in power to have a sudden awakening and run things in the manner we deem proper, letting our resentment of the poor state of the system withhold the true potential of greatness that lies in us youth, let us more than stand up for a better future, let’s conceive and work towards a better future ourselves.

This we can achieve by simply channeling our energy to developing our talents, whatever they may be, through consistent training either by self or more advisably from professionals. One needs not try being in a profession because it is the widely accepted one, we can only impact on our nation by giving our nation the best of what we naturally are good at, not what we’ve learnt to be good at.

Take a look at the recently released movie Ijé that stars Genevieve Nnaji and Omotola Jalade-Ekeinde among others, the script of the film production was done by Chineze Anyaene, a Nigerian student at the prestigious New York Film Academy, as a thesis. And if she was not determined to see her work come to reality; having gone to length in convincing Omotola and Genevieve in particular to be a part of the project, the impact the film Ijé is destined to have on the Nigerian film industry as evident in the rave reviews it has received so far would not have come to fruition had she not decided to “conceive and work towards a better Nigeria”. For all we know, she could well have executed the film over at the US and not involve any Nigerian artistes on it, then it would be her personal glory. But here, it’s a win situation for her, the Nigerian film industry and the country as a whole; which is what we should strive to achieve.

Discover what you’re very good at; something you’ve found capable of doing well with ease and even under pressure, and then set about improving yourself at it. You will do yourself a great good by that and our dear Nigeria by extension…yes we can!

©δ.õÁ 06/08/2010 ™


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Days of Dread……

In a boy’s life, February 14 usually is a dreaded day…if only he understands the ‘skirt’ dealing man he’ll grow to (become). The boy also dreads mid-September because it marks the end of Disneyland fairytales and the return of School, home-work and those ‘damn’ teachers.

Monday! The boy hates this noun phrase of a day but it is not half as much as his father, “Gawd, Monday already!?!?!” he says when the alarm wakes him up abruptly well before six in the morning.

If you know someone actually named Monday, you find they actually are fun people (just a wild guess) but they just got the wrong name tag on dem birth certificates lol (no libel intended). So what of fellas named after the other noun phrase…Thank God it’s Friday? Unfortunately they can never be as fun as what happens on nights of dem days the world over.

Then there is Sunday, supposed pure of heart and all…and I used to know one like that but as time dey change, na so people dey change but some people overkill it with the change factor as well.

Anyway, these three along with millions more across the world dread the day she comes to him all yippee yay smiley…”I’m pregnant!”, a day even more dreaded when there’s no ring of proof (yes o). Some even do well not to be selfish…”baby, we’re having a baby…”, who’s been had now?

And much as women look forward to the D Day, it usually is that Saturday some seriously crunch football match is going down but dare his soul if he shows his regret (at missing the match, not at saying I do) because she is damn to elated…best to live up to the day or get deflated by her…literally.

He also dreads the day, years after, that his boy’s teenage sister would come home one day with some riff raff’s baby growing inside her…like he’s not got enough to settle with the madam already. Thankfully, that is an option in life – unwanted pregnancies but ‘book lists’, now that’s factory fitted feature in the daughters and they just keep coming (one’s in the University and the third is in Junior Secondary)

Time goes a bit further and he’s footing the bill of her wedding (the first) to another man, “I love him” she says to her father, “beans” he says…to himself. The other two follow suit, “double beans!”

On to the worse dread days in his life, she finds out after all these years…”you’ve been cheating on me! How could you, HOW?!?” He knows anything he says would be stupid but, “honey, it was the devil”…yea yea, and that devil’s prada was too much for your swagger!

Because they are Nigerians, they dread court days but that’s just the least of it. She dreads the day she’ll be the one among her peers on the end of goosip talk of having no husband or his money to flaunt, “Prisca had it real bad…not me!”. He meanwhile now dreads the day she finds out he’s helping himself with…on the maid/house-help.

Ah yes, the chores have piled up recently so he’s been lending a third hand all around the house. But (sh)it happens, she let’s go of vomit in madam’s presence, prompting basic instinct to set in, “who’s the bastard responsible???”. She’s thinking it’s Hassan the gateman but, “n…n…na…ei, madam abeg…na oga”…it’s over for Angela to house-help(ing).

Rage! “Hell hath no fury…” comes to life in full adrenaline flow and madam pummels the poor girl before going inside to make him his favourite dinner…no no, no poison, that’s for Nollywood!

They have an argument on his way to bed and at the top of the stairs, it gets very heated and she shoves him. He misses a step and goes down the flight of stairs, head banging hard on the marble floor at the end.

The worst dread days arrive abruptly, the day he dies…if only he had gone for confession rather than answer Coleen’s call; “stupid 300L ‘lag girl, why did y…” he dies!. For her, her worst dreaded day will come soon after, she now will face his relatives and this time, they’re right!

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